Roast my website.

A free website roast and grader from VibeKing. Paste any URL and you get a verdict from Absolute royalty to Cooked, a two-line roast, a 0-100 Vibe Score, the three fixes that matter most, and the receipts: about 30 checks across first impression, speed, mobile, SEO, AI-readiness and security.

Every point comes from code, not opinion. We fetch the homepage once and run pass/fail checks: title and meta description length, og:image, viewport, render-blocking scripts, time to first byte, sitemap.xml, JSON-LD, /llms.txt, whether robots.txt lets GPTBot and ClaudeBot in, HTTPS, HSTS, Content-Security-Policy and more. Speed and SEO carry 20% each, the other four 15%.

Yes, but the AI only sees the findings from the checks, so every joke points at something real on the page. It roasts the website, never the people behind it. If the AI is unavailable, the roast comes from templates built on the same findings.

Yes. Pick “A friend’s site”, add their X handle if you like, and the share text becomes “I vibe-checked @them’s site…”. The roast is always about the website only.

Two sites, head to head. Both get checked, the higher Vibe Score wins, and you get a winner card to post.

The AI-ready score checks four things: a published /llms.txt, JSON-LD structured data, a robots.txt that allows AI crawlers such as GPTBot, ClaudeBot and PerplexityBot, and readable text before JavaScript runs.

Free, no sign-up. Each IP can run 10 fresh checks an hour, and results are cached for 24 hours per domain.